last night bean read the book that the ivf company gave us with different eyes. this time she saw the terrible statistics (30% chance of a positive pregnancy test, but only a 21% change of a fetal heartbeat at 7 weeks); the endless encouragement to put in two embryos instead of one; the hopelessness of it all.
i am tempted to write down all the hard things from this week (there a lot), but that will just turn this into another angsty sorenson post (what, you mean it is already? darn). just let it be known that i can’t wait for this week and the next to be over. and i can’t stop thinking about that little pip lodged in bean’s belly. no matter how hard i try to be all stoic, i can’t help feeling somehow desperately hopeful and yet helplessly resigned all at the same time.
